Love Letters from Ana: To the Summer Set


The cherry blossoms are ornamenting campus with their linen whites and powder pinks. The birds and the bees have emerged in a united goal of creating lyrical buzzing symphonies. Yes, it’s finally spring. With summer just around the corner, many of us are thinking of what is going to happen to our friendships, crushes, relationships, and “kinda-relationships” when we are no longer in the 18042.

Any friends you’ve had over the past year, whether they’re newly made or fortified when you were froshies, are the easiest relationships to upkeep. Most of us have had plenty of training dealing with long distance friendships when we left high school friends behind for college. It’s the same deal: phone calls and Skype are the ideal forms of communication.

One of the hardest relationships to maintain over the summer will be the people that you are kinda-sorta friends with. Maybe it’s that antisocial freshman year roommate that you abandoned during the housing lottery for one of your best friends. Maybe it is someone with whom you’ve shared a few drunken bonding moments. A great conversation starter that always lightens the mood is if you see something on Buzzfeed or Stumbleupon that reminds you of a conversation you had.

It is very difficult to stay in contact with someone you have a crush on over the summer. There’s also a thin line between politely checking in and being creepy. If you’re friends, you will probably have an easier time maintaining a relationship. The one thing you may have to come to terms with is that your relationship with your crush may not be the same when you come back in the fall. The jury is still out on whether distance makes the heart grow fonder or out of sight, out of mind. Just remember that summer can be a time to meet new people or let go of people from your past.

For flings or label-less relationships, it is important to ask where you are and where your relationship is going before you leave for the summer. Women often have a fear of looking desperate when voicing their needs in a relationship, but no one wants to waste their time involved in something that isn’t quite hitting the mark. Ask the hard questions, even if the answer is not what you want to hear. Ending something now will allow you to having a clean start in the fall. If you get a “let’s keep things casual and see where it all goes” kind of response, just make sure you verify whether or not the two of you are going to see other people.

If you are in an established relationship, it is still important to talk about plans for the summer. Distance is always an obstacle in a relationship, but the summer months do go by fast. Try visiting each other or meeting somewhere you’ve both haven’t been before. If you’re both working or traveling, Skype may become your best friend.

Summer is a time to regroup and reflect on the past year. Being in the presence of family and friends from home allows you to look at the relationships you’ve built in college and evaluate which are worth keeping and which are not. Whether you are dreading the summer or cannot think about anything else, summer offers all of us a chance to appreciate for the relationships we have built at Lafayette.