Love letters from Ana: Guy’s Girl v. Girl’s Girl


They’re terms tossed around colloquially during girl talk. They’re even sometimes used as excuses for our behavior. “Sorry, I haven’t been around lately. I’ve been hanging with the guys. I’m really more of a guy’s girl actually…” But, do we ever really know if we’re a “guy’s girl” or a “girl’s girl?” What does it mean to relate better to one gender over another? Does a true “guy’s girl” or “girl’s girl” exist?

There isn’t a particular moment in life where we need to decide whether we are a “guy’s girl” or a “girl’s girl.” The time which we self-proclaim one of these titles is usually in a time of deep conversing with our girlfriends and we are also usually prompted to provide this information. Some believe that being a “guy’s girl” or a “girl’s girl” depends on a girl’s masculinity versus her femininity, but a “guy’s girl” should not be confused with tomboy as a “girl’s girl” should not be confused with a girly-girl. The label of a “guy’s girl” and “girl’s girl” has solely to do with what gender you relate better to. This could be because you grew up around four brothers and you feel more yourself around men or your mom was a single parent and your best friend and therefore you connect better with your girlfriends. Note: that a “guy’s girl” is not a girl who fools around with a bunch of dudes, and a “girl’s girl” is not a girl who’s never had a boyfriend. These labels are strictly about friendship with the same or opposite sex.

Whether you’re currently a self-proclaimed “guy’s girl” or “girl’s girl,” you will mostly likely switch to the other side at one point or another. And this is because these labels are more like phases and waves of our development in our relationships. Some of you reading this may even be saying to yourself, “I consider myself both or neither,” and you’re completely right. This because most girls at some point will experience a time where their life revolves around guys and another time where it revolves around girls. Think about the times you’ve had in middle school (sorry to recall such an unpleasant time for most of us), some days your life revolved around your crush or overwhelmed by girl drama. Even now, if you’re in a new relationship and you’ve been hanging out a lot lately with your new guy and his friends so much that his friends have become your friends, you may consider yourself a “guy’s girl” at that particular moment. If you just experienced a break up and need some girl time in the club, you connection with the female spirit couldn’t be any higher.

In college and in the work force, you have to be both a “guy’s girl” and a “girl’s girl.” You’re probably going to have your girlfriend’s back at a party and you may want to grab a beer at a sports bar in the city with your boss. The point is, by declaring yourself as one or the other, a “guy’s girl” or a “girl’s girl,” you are limiting yourself. They say that life imitates art, but life also imitates labels. College prepares you to work with both genders and relate to both, perhaps in different ways, but as equally as possible. Although at one time or another you might have a preference in what gender you want to be with on a Friday night, it’s important to keep in mind that although men may be from Mars and women from Venus, we all have to coexist in the same galaxy.